Snakes on a Blog

This post isn’t about a dream, this is about a waking nightmare!

Earlier this week, I stepped into the garage, hit the button to open the garage door, and saw this!

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Probably larger than life snake in our garage.

I wasn’t exactly sure what it was because we currently have a rope and bungi cord stuck in a tree out front and the first time I saw them, I thought they were a snake. So I walked through the garage as far away from the possible snake as I could and made it to the driveway. At that point I confirmed it was a snake but since it totally ignored me, I wasn’t sure it was alive. I’m pretty sure the scientific method for determining the health status of wild animals is throwing rocks at them, so I did that… but only small rocks because I didn’t want to accidentally hit it and make a squish. But first I took a picture (see above) and then cropped it, so it would look like I was closer and/or the snake was bigger. Then I threw the rocks at it and it didn’t move so I conlcuded it’s 1) got nerves of steel 2) a heavy sleeper or 3) dead. Since my testing did not result in any conclusive findings, I did what any responsible researcher would do and left my findings to be confirmed with a more qualified researcher. So, I trapped the would-be actor snake faking death in the nationally recognized dunno-if-it’s-dead-snake-trapping device (pictured below) and went to work but I did send a pictorial text to DSR so he could handle the situation when he got home.

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The containment device.

The non-snake-violated population would see this as an upside down trash can with two rocks on top.  It is actually a vermin certified, I don’t want to move it, in case it is alive and waiting to rear up and bite me, containment device. Snakes are sneaky like that.

This isn’t our first run in with desert dwelling belly rubbers… we had a snake in our backyard that escaped our brave screams by slithering under the house. We’re pretty sure it’s still there and growing to mammoth proportions. Maybe this is one her babies trying to make it on its own. Crap… now the mammoth snake is going to be mad and blame us. It will probably attack us in the night while we’re sleeping. (Sleeping = dreaming / See how I brought that story full cirlce?)

I wish nature would respect my boundaries… I’m thinking 10 miles from the property line is a respectful distance.

Update: The snake was in-fact dead. DSR saved us all with his 4 Iron and we can all sleep better knowing that… um, no, there’s no sleeping better. We live in the desert and these damn snakes think they have a right to warm up in our garage!

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